Many Christians are familiar with the following quote of Jesus' in Matthew 18. But I have never heard of anyone using it in a marital situation. My question is: why not?
15"If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. 16 But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector."
My mom's friend (I'll call her Veronica) from church is going through a very terrible divorce. Veronica's husband (I'll call him Bob) had numerous affairs over the past 30+ years. Two of the most recent affairs have been with a woman in foreign country while on a mission trip and with a woman young enough to be his granddaughter. Veronica has been keeping all of this a secret for years because she wanted to save her marriage and help her husband. While this is admirable, I think she might have had more success in those regards if she had told a couple of fellow Christians years ago and had them confront Bob. If Bob did not listen to the friends, then taking the issue to the church does not seem uncalled for. Then this sin could not have been hidden and who knows how many woman could have been saved from Bob's clutches.
Yet I have never heard of anyone applying Matthew 18 to marriage problems. But surely Bob sinned against Veronica. So why do we never discuss following this plan with adultery problems or gambling problems or abusive situations or addiction problems?
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Monday, September 5, 2011
Vigilante Left Me with a Heavy Feeling
The book Vigilante written by Robin Parrish reminded me something of a Christian batman. I received this book from Bethany House for review. I picked it because I generally like action books, super heroes, and don't mind a little violence. So I thought I would love this book. Yet as I finished the book, I just felt heavy. Not sad, mind you. Just weighed down.
Maybe that is the point of the book. Maybe it is supposed to make you think about heavy topics like when is violence as a Christian appropriate. Maybe Robin Parrish wants the reader to consider the depths to which humanity can sink and ponder what to do about it. But I read fiction for enjoyment. I read for fun. I did not find this book fun to read.
Even though I didn't really end up liking this book, it will likely appeal to many. It was well written. The characters are solid. And certainly the premise is not boring. So I ended up giving it three stars.
Maybe that is the point of the book. Maybe it is supposed to make you think about heavy topics like when is violence as a Christian appropriate. Maybe Robin Parrish wants the reader to consider the depths to which humanity can sink and ponder what to do about it. But I read fiction for enjoyment. I read for fun. I did not find this book fun to read.
Even though I didn't really end up liking this book, it will likely appeal to many. It was well written. The characters are solid. And certainly the premise is not boring. So I ended up giving it three stars.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Secret Stands
I have come to a realization about my church. They refuse to take a public stand on many cultural issues, but sometimes take a stand behind the scenes. For example, a new ministers first sermon is about it being a Christian duty to go green and shrink one's carbon footprint. He disappears in less than a month. One story is that he missed his home state too much. But the other is that many people were alarmed at his sermon and he was given the opportunity to go back home. Let's just say that the second reason is correct for the sake of this post.
The leadership refuses to take a stand on "issues" (I guess the green movement/creation stewardship is one of these) because it will "detract from our mission". But the minister ends up gone. And I feel wary of the leadership. The level of transparency is rather disheartening. Even the city government has more transparency.
On a separate, but related topic. . .
We recently ordained 15 more elders. One of the comments made during the ceremony was that we should honor our leaders because we have no idea what they do (in reference to helping people). But the comment really struck me. A shepherd parable in the Bible says the shepherd knows each sheep by name and the sheep knew the sound of the shepherd's voice. How can 40 or so men (including the new 15) know 5000+ people? And obviously they don't expect us to really know them if it is accepted that we don't know what they do.
Our church motto is Building followers of Christ through worship, community, and service. But this just doesn't seem like a community to me.
The leadership refuses to take a stand on "issues" (I guess the green movement/creation stewardship is one of these) because it will "detract from our mission". But the minister ends up gone. And I feel wary of the leadership. The level of transparency is rather disheartening. Even the city government has more transparency.
On a separate, but related topic. . .
We recently ordained 15 more elders. One of the comments made during the ceremony was that we should honor our leaders because we have no idea what they do (in reference to helping people). But the comment really struck me. A shepherd parable in the Bible says the shepherd knows each sheep by name and the sheep knew the sound of the shepherd's voice. How can 40 or so men (including the new 15) know 5000+ people? And obviously they don't expect us to really know them if it is accepted that we don't know what they do.
Our church motto is Building followers of Christ through worship, community, and service. But this just doesn't seem like a community to me.
Friday, August 5, 2011
Evangelism without Community
We had a good lesson from the youth minister at our church on Wednesday night. It was about evangelism and how it has an aura of distastefulness in American churches. One of the main reasons he gave is that evangelism is often feels (or actually is) contrived.
Now before I go any further, I have to say that one of the reasons that we chose the church we did is that evangelism actually occurs. The leaders participate in sharing the Gospel with the lost. Actual people from the world give their lives to Jesus and are baptized instead of just people from the youth group who have been going to church their whole lives.
Now back to the point of this post. I believe that one of the biggest hindrances to the overwhelming spread of the Kingdom of God in America today is a lack of community. As a member of the missions committee, I get to hear stories of how whole people groups are converted to the Lord. All of peoples that I know about are societies where the people live in community.
What do I mean by community? I mean a group of people whose lives are woven together on a daily basis. I mean a setting where friendships and work and religious ceremonies and family are all tangled together. For example, the shepherd and the weaver have a relationship because they rely on one another. Everyone in town knows your worst mistake because they were their when you did it but they still hang out with you anyway. People who have done some hard things together often form lifelong friendships. We Americans hardly have any of that. We are largely disconnected from people outside our immediate family. What connection we have is often tempered by technology; we often interact without actually being near the person.
Let me give an example from my own life. My husband has something of a community at his work with a Christian ministry. I am forming something of a community with the Christian homeschool co-op. But my husband and I aren't really in community with anyone as a family except in some respects with our small group at church. And the people we are in the most contact with have knowledge of and are trying to live for Jesus.
When we lived in Phoenix, it was somewhat different. We had no kids. I worked at a landscape architecture office, and my husband worked as a bill collector and then in financial services. We had lots of friends that were searching for the truth about Jesus and we were happy to share what we knew. Two people were even baptized in our swimming pool.
But if I want my kids to experience evangelism, I will have to contrive something. It might be going on a short term mission trip or involved in a ministry at church . Or I could try to form a deeper relationship with our old lawn mower man since I know that he and his family do not have a church home. Now I am not saying that any of these ideas are wrong or bad. I am saying that they do not flow from my normal life.
In places where the Good News of Jesus flows through the land like healing water, there are already relationship channels for it to flow through.
Now before I go any further, I have to say that one of the reasons that we chose the church we did is that evangelism actually occurs. The leaders participate in sharing the Gospel with the lost. Actual people from the world give their lives to Jesus and are baptized instead of just people from the youth group who have been going to church their whole lives.
Now back to the point of this post. I believe that one of the biggest hindrances to the overwhelming spread of the Kingdom of God in America today is a lack of community. As a member of the missions committee, I get to hear stories of how whole people groups are converted to the Lord. All of peoples that I know about are societies where the people live in community.
What do I mean by community? I mean a group of people whose lives are woven together on a daily basis. I mean a setting where friendships and work and religious ceremonies and family are all tangled together. For example, the shepherd and the weaver have a relationship because they rely on one another. Everyone in town knows your worst mistake because they were their when you did it but they still hang out with you anyway. People who have done some hard things together often form lifelong friendships. We Americans hardly have any of that. We are largely disconnected from people outside our immediate family. What connection we have is often tempered by technology; we often interact without actually being near the person.
Let me give an example from my own life. My husband has something of a community at his work with a Christian ministry. I am forming something of a community with the Christian homeschool co-op. But my husband and I aren't really in community with anyone as a family except in some respects with our small group at church. And the people we are in the most contact with have knowledge of and are trying to live for Jesus.
When we lived in Phoenix, it was somewhat different. We had no kids. I worked at a landscape architecture office, and my husband worked as a bill collector and then in financial services. We had lots of friends that were searching for the truth about Jesus and we were happy to share what we knew. Two people were even baptized in our swimming pool.
But if I want my kids to experience evangelism, I will have to contrive something. It might be going on a short term mission trip or involved in a ministry at church . Or I could try to form a deeper relationship with our old lawn mower man since I know that he and his family do not have a church home. Now I am not saying that any of these ideas are wrong or bad. I am saying that they do not flow from my normal life.
In places where the Good News of Jesus flows through the land like healing water, there are already relationship channels for it to flow through.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Intolerance of Kids
I heard recently on TV that Americans spend more time grooming that caring for kids. Now as a homeschooling mom of 2 with a tiny sliver of my day given to grooming, that came as a surprise to me. But really it shouldn't have. With day cares and schools, fewer and fewer grown-ups are raising the fewer and fewer kids we are having. Maybe that is why there is a growing amount of intolerance for kids in trendy society.
Instead of promoting family and kids, the trend seems to be to ban them. Here are some examples:
McDain's restaurant banned kids under six in PA.
Some people want to ban babies from planes (or at least business class).
People are calling it "brat bans" and it may be the next big deal for vacation destinations.
At at least one movie theater, kids under six are no longer welcome except on "baby days".
Now I have been the parent with a melt-down kid and I have been the childless adult annoyed that a parent was allowing a tantrum in a theater. But it still saddens me to read these things.
Instead of promoting family and kids, the trend seems to be to ban them. Here are some examples:
McDain's restaurant banned kids under six in PA.
Some people want to ban babies from planes (or at least business class).
People are calling it "brat bans" and it may be the next big deal for vacation destinations.
At at least one movie theater, kids under six are no longer welcome except on "baby days".
Now I have been the parent with a melt-down kid and I have been the childless adult annoyed that a parent was allowing a tantrum in a theater. But it still saddens me to read these things.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Spending on Education
I thought you might enjoy this video by Heritage Foundation. It does a great job of explaining why spending more tax dollars on education isn't the answer.
I think the whole education system would be better without the government at all. There is a great website about this point of view called the Alliance for the Separation of School and State. I encourage you to go check it out.
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